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Is your man commitment phobic? Here's what to do!

  • Dailybhaskar.com
  • Nov 30, 2012, 13:44 PM IST
Is your man commitment phobic? Here's what to do!, fashion news in English

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Has your relationship become an obligation for your partner, wherein, he keeps on evading the complexities of the entire arrangement? Wondering why your man is not ready to commit to you in spite of the fact that he loves you (at least that’s what you think)?

Well, youngsters today are generally scared of making commitments as they have frivolous options like one night stands and live in relationships but have ever thought why it’s happening to you?

If you actually go out and check how many of your friends are commitment phobic, you’ll be surprised at the revelations. The generation today, especially men folk have accepted their inability to commit in relationships and tagged it as ‘commitment phobia’, for according to them, it is a commonly occurring phenomenon.

Himanshu, 26, a Finance Professional, has been in a relationship since two years and has still not quite made up his mind about the future. “I do love my girlfriend but then, I don’t know how well we’ll gel if I take this forward. She has pestered me for a commitment twice already but I’ve clearly told her that I need time to think about the same and it is working for the two of us”.

5 excuses of commitment phobic men:

You’ve changed 
Well, you can’t imagine how many people use this one but, what’s important is the fact that it works, almost always! Playing the blame game is the easiest thing to do, isn’t it?  So, your man might just come to you one day and tell you that you aren’t the person he fell for and that you have changed in entirety.

I don’t think I am ready for a commitment yet
This one is the most cliché excuse but, perhaps the most commonly used one. A lot of times, people move forward with the relationship without thinking about the consequence and also, ignoring the fact that they’re commitment phobic and hence, comes this excuse, proving to be just the right rescue.

I don’t want you to wait for me
“I love you too much to let you wait for me”. Doesn’t this sound familiar? Yes, it truly does and this one is just apt when your man doesn’t know what to say to you when you ask for a commitment. 
You deserve someone better
This comes right after the above mentioned excuse. Not being able to tolerate anyone waiting for you for the rest of his life is directly proportional to him telling you that you deserve someone even better.

There is no future
Doesn’t parental pressure lead to a- “there is no future,” kind of an excuse? Well, don’t think that the parents’ objection is the real issue here, for it’s nothing more than a shoddy reason to run away from a commitment.

What’s sad is the fact that women, who are stuck in such relationships end up like passive smokers, they don’t cause their misery but can’t avoid it too.

Neha Chauhan, 25, a Media Professional, is stuck up in a similar relationship and is weathering all the troubles, all for love. “Being with a non committal man is a curse but all I can do is wait. I have to have faith in my love”.

All said and done, if you still think that you can’t think about someone else but him? Then, you don’t have a choice lady and all you can do is try the following tips to ensure that your man runs after you as much as he makes you do.

Here's what to do:

Tell him he’s the one
It doesn’t really matter if he’s taking time to come to a conclusion until he’s totally clear about you inside. Tell him that you know he’s the perfect one for you. This way you’ll win his confidence and make him realize that he too should reciprocate if he wants you in his life. 

Be true
Well, it’s only common sense to tell him what you want. It’s so much more better for a man to know what his woman expects from him and what she doesn’t. There’s no point in beating around the bush in order to win his commitment. Tell him what you feel within. Also, if he’s taking too long in coming to a decision then, tell him right away that you might not be able to continue like this for long. Such warnings work to the hilt, just try them out.

Give him space
Don’t just run after him. Remember, if you run after a man, he’ll run farther from you. You want him? Then, set him free, give him the space he requires and once he’s gauged the fact that you give him enough space, he’ll certainly want you in his life.

Don’t make him jealous
If you think jealousy works with men, you’re wrong. Try and make him jealous and he’ll instantly doubt your character and also your love for him. Instead win his affection to the core by showing him that you’re a one man woman.

Become indispensable for him 
Make him understand that he can’t do without you and he has to have you for a better and happy future. Be around when he needs you and your presence will automatically become indispensable in his life.

Make him understand that he can’t do without you and he has to have you for a better and happy future. Be around when he needs you and your presence will automatically become indispensable in his life.

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